Things my mother taught me

With Christmas time approaching what better excuse do you need to get in the kitchen & do some baking. Rum balls are one of my favourite treats at Christmas and they are so easy to make - you simply can't go wrong & they taste GREAT!

Ingredients:

400g condensed milk
225g crushed sweet biscuits
1 cup coconut
1 ½ cups cocoa
60 mls of rum (or to taste)
1 cup chopped raisins

& extra coconut to roll

Mix all ingredients together, roll into balls & then roll in coconut - leave in fridge to harden. Package them up in noodle boxes & give them to a neighbour or a friend, but don't forget to tell them about the rum!

Things my mother taught me

Never go to bed with anger in your heart. If you have quarelled with someone say sorry even if you believe you are in the right - winning an argument may bring you short term satisfaction but will not lead to any lasting happiness or reward.

Great women from art, literature & myth

Spain by Surrealist painter Salvador Dali - a painting making use of double imagery in the form of a female figure, reminiscent of a Renaissance painting, to symbolise the Spanish Civil War. The female form is made up of groups of men, women & horses in the mist of battle, she is seen to be leaning on a chest of drawers symbolising the opening of the subconscious - the unveiling of the hidden. Dali himself viewed the War as a "phenomenon of natural history," he saw it as being something that was essential to reveal the core of Spain's heritage. And the scarf or banner that sits half in half out of the drawer, with its meaty texture & colour, could be equally interpreted as a "pound of flesh".

"that this earth of Spain held hidden in the depths of it's entrails."

-DALI-

Great women from art, literature & myth

Psyche:

"Oh box of beauty,
Can I not have a little of you for myself
After all I have been through the gates of hell
& back again just to capture you
To deliver you unto my queen
Can’t I take just a little?
To make my hair more golden
To make my eyes more blue
For I’m tired from my journey
My face, my body ravaged by the task
If I just take a little peep at you
I doubt that Venus would mind
For I’m so tired, so very tired
So tired that I fear I may just fall
....asleep"

Great women from art, literature & myth

Catherine Earnshaw, the tragic heroine of Emily Bronte’s Wuthering Heights, soon becomes inseparable from Heathcliff, the gypsy-demon child her father brings home from the streets of Liverpool. In their youth they pass the days together, as wild as the windy moors that surround their home. Raised as brother & sister, but not, as time passes, fate has it that Heathcliff is relegated to mere farm hand whilst Catherine is encouraged to become a lady & is pursued by the eligible Edgar Linton. After receiving a marriage proposal from Edgar, Cathy approaches Nelly for advice, not knowing that Heathcliff stands nearby able to hear every word.

"It would degrade me to marry Heathcliff now; so he shall never know how I love him: and that, not because he's handsome, Nelly, but because he's more myself than I am. Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same; and Linton's is as different as a moonbeam from lightning, or frost from fire."

On overhearing this Heathcliff leaves the Heights. Many years pass & he returns, after making his fortune, to reclaim Wuthering Heights & Cathy. He does everything in his power to torment & bring ruin to those who have crossed him – including his beloved Catherine.

If only Heathcliff had not overheard that conversation between Cathy & Nelly, would things have turned out any different? Or if he had listened in a little longer he would have heard what Cathy was really saying, what was really in her heart.

"My love for Linton is like the foliage in the woods. Time will change it, I'm well aware, as winter changes the trees - but my love for Heathcliff resembles the eternal rocks beneath - a source of little visible delight, but necessary”

"Nelly, I am Heathcliff! He's always, always in my mind: not as a pleasure, any more than I am always a pleasure to myself, but as my own being."

Even when Catherine is dead Heathcliff continues his need to consume her, whether this be through the capture & containment of her daughter, or the ceaseless summoning of her spirit - forever denying it peace. Yet you get the feeling Cathy would have chosen this regardless, anything to be near him, her Heathcliff.... her "Home"

Things my mother taught me

From an early age my mother taught me of the reality of marriage, that for a relationship to last you have to be willing to do two things - to forgive & to compromise. My parents have been married for 45 years, have had their ups & downs but are closer now than ever.

"Love is an ideal thing. Marriage is a real thing."

-GOETHE-

Inspirational Women - Her Excellency Ms Quentin Bryce

Her Excellency Ms Quentin Bryce was sworn is as Australia's 25th Governor General on 5 September 2008. Upon my first meeting with Ms Bryce, I was in awe of her exuberance, her charisma, her immaculate presentation, her enquiring eyes.

I did not recognise her and started to enquire as to what her vocation in life was, I said assumingly, "You are a leader, a lawyer perhaps?". To which Ms Bryce so politely said, "Yes I was a lawyer, I am the Governor of Queensland" (this was before being appointed Governor General). To which I replied, "oh of course you are" (I then had images of her face flooding back to me from news stories I had seen her in. Needless to say I was terribly embarrassed).

I have had few people influence me in my life as Ms Bryce has - she has this incredible way of making you feel like you can take on the world. I remember after my first encounter with Ms Bryce walking around for days looking for extra ways to make a difference and feeling empowered, feeling like I could do something great, something wonderful on this earth - truly made me feel like she was pulling the best out of me. What an incredible craft!

I have met Ms Bryce only a few times - the last time we spoke I said to her, "You are such an inspiration to me". And she so graciously said, "Janmaree, you are an inspiration to me". I was lost for words, how could I be an inspiration to this wonderful woman - a true tower of strength to so many, the Governor General of Australia?!

It came as no surprise to me when I read a piece about her that contained these words:

"As a mother and grandmother, Quentin is a role model and mentor to women at every stage of their lives. She values and encourages women’s capacity to form strong and enduring bonds of friendship, intellectual and emotional enrichment, and mutual support in their roles within the family, workplace and community." (www.gg.gov.au/governorgeneral/content.php?id=40).

Ms Quentin Bryce you are amazing. I thank you for the wonderful light you are to so many. I am blessed to have met you and am forever changed for it.

The Brown Book

No one can come close to another, let alone love him, without coming close to his sufferings.

- Houselander -

Carry On

Carry on, carry on -
as withered as you feel,
carry on.
The winds of life
will breathe air into
your tired lungs.
Trust, trust, trust.

from The Brown Book
- Sunflower -

Inspirational women - Dame Anita Roddick 1942-2007

Anita Roddick founded The Body Shop in 1976 at the age of 34; today it is the 2nd most trusted brand in the UK. During those grassroots days Anita set the foundations for a new way of conducting business, The Body Shop was the first to prohibit the use of ingredients tested on animals & was also one of the first to promote fair trade with third world countries. In 1993 Anita spoke of her early days of building up the business:

“The original Body Shop was a series of brilliant accidents. It had a great smell, it had a funky name. It was positioned between two funeral parlours--that always caused controversy. It was incredibly sensuous. It was 1976, the year of the heat wave, so there was a lot of flesh around. We knew about storytelling then, so all the products had stories. We recycled everything, not because we were environmentally friendly, but because we didn’t have enough bottles. It was a good idea. What was unique about it, with no intent at all, no marketing nous, was that it translated across cultures, across geographical barriers and social structures. It wasn’t a sophisticated plan, it just happened like that”

In her later years she dedicated more and more of her time to charitable work; this included founding COTE (children on the edge) for orphans, and working for the UN and Greenpeace. Towards the end of her life she also grew to be less materialistic and gave away a great deal of her fortune. Upon her death she left her entire estate to charity.

"Get informed. Get inspired. Get outraged. Get Active"

Anita Roddick

Great women from art, literature & myth

Mariana by John Everett Millais was first shown at the Royal Academy in 1851 where the painting was accompanied by the following lines from the eponymous Tennyson poem:

She only said, ‘My life is dreary-
He cometh not’ she said;
She said, ‘I am aweary, aweary –
I would that I were dead’.

How long has she been sitting there, waiting for her lover to return? The leaves turn brown & fall to the ground about her feet; mice scavenge the floor for remnants from her table. You can almost feel the warmth of the stool where Mariana has sat waiting….wanting – she arches her back now & lengthens out her fatigued frame. Her face, one of a woman past caring with no more tears to shed, tells of her desertion….of her abandonment. The rich tapestries that adorn the room; the lush velvet of her dress; now mere reminders of a tomorrow that may never come.

Things My Mother Taught Me

To be polite, very polite: listen when I am spoken to, say hello and goodbye to guests, excuse myself from a conversation if needed, wait patiently for others and never cause a fuss.

Lives of great men remind us,
We can make our lives sublime
And departing leave behind us

Footprints on the sands of time

from The Brown Book
- H.W. Longfellow -

Great women from art, literature & myth

I can see them now
Approaching on their chariots
They ride into war
The Valkyrie,
Ready to administer their mark upon men.
Odin’s charges,
Warrior maidens of light,
Tell me, who will fight alongside the great god?
Who will see the battle at the end of the world?
She beckons me now,
Freyja, the mighty mistress of the slain.
She crowns me victorious,
She takes my armour,
Retains my sword
And guides me onwards to Asgard

Things my mother taught me

To never be tardy & always be on time, if not a little early - with everything!

"People count the faults of those who keep them waiting"

-French proverb-

Inspirational women - Florence Nightingale 1820-1910

Florence Nightingale, Nurse, writer and gifted statistician. Florence was born into a wealthy upper class British family in which she was expected to “marry well” & become a “homemaker” & “mother.” In defiance of her parents wishes Florence chose to become a nurse & devote her life to furthering the profession. Florence’s family were devastated, especially her mother, for in those days nursing had a poor reputation, being performed mostly by poorer women, whose duties resembled that of a cook rather than nurse. Florence chose to remain unmarried so she could dedicate herself fully to her work, despite having her share of suitors, including politician and poet Richard Monckton Milnes, the 1st Baron of Houghton. Florence carved out a name for herself in the Crimean war, she made extensive use of statistics and was a pioneer in the area of public health & sanitation. Florence not only had a profound effect upon the education of nurses in Britain but also mentored Linda Richards - America's first trained nurse.

Amongst her many accomplishments, Florence was awarded the Royal Red Cross by Queen Victoria in 1883, and in 1907 she became the first woman to be awarded the Order of Merit. International Nurses Day is celebrated annually on her birthday, May 12th.

Lo! In that hour of misery

A lady with a lamp I see

Pass through the glimmering gloom,

And flit from room to room.
-Longfellow-

Great women from art, literature & myth

Countess Ellen Olenska from Edith Wharton’s The Age of Innocence, a controversial character, full of passion & brute honesty. Newly arrived from Europe, where she has presumably left her husband, she arrives in New York to face the gossip & brutal criticism of its citizens. Amongst them is her cousin May & her fiancé Newland Archer. Ellen is like no one Newland has ever met; all his convictions (including his love for May) are suddenly thrown into doubt. And the high society of upper class New York which he once found so engaging becomes vacuous & dull. A rapturous love develops between Ellen & Newland, a love quelled by an unforgiving world, a world where rules reign over truth.

The Age of Innocence was the winner of the 1921 Pulitzer Prize - the first Pulitzer ever awarded to a woman. The following passage is one of my favourites:

When the men joined the ladies after dinner the Duke went straight up to the Countess Olenska, and they sat down in a corner and plunged into animated talk. Neither seemed aware that the Duke should first have paid his respects to Mrs. Lovell Mingott and Mrs. Headley Chivers, and the countess have conversed with that amiable hypochondriac, Mr. Urban Dagonet of Washington Square, who, in order to have the pleasure of meeting her, had broken through his fixed rule of not dinning out between January and April. The two chatted together for nearly twenty minutes; then the Countess rose and, walking alone across the wide drawing-room, sat down at Newland Archer’s side.

It was not the custom in New York drawing-rooms for a lady to get up and walk away from one gentleman in order to seek the company of another. Etiquette required that she should wait, immovable as an idol, while the men who wished to converse with her succeeded each other at her side. But the Countess was apparently unaware of having broken any rule; she sat at perfect ease in a corner of the sofa beside Archer, and looked at him with the kindest eyes.

“I want you to talk to me about May,” she said
Instead of answering her he asked: “You knew the Duke before?”
“Oh, yes – we used to see him every winter at Nice. He’s very fond of gambling – he used to come to the house a great deal.” She said it in the simplest manner, as if she had said: “He’s fond of wild-flowers”; and after a moment she added candidly: “I think he’s the dullest man I ever met.”

**********

“May is a darling; I’ve seen no young girl in New York so handsome and so intelligent. Are you very much in love with her?”
Newland Archer reddened and laughed. “As much as a man can be”
She continued to consider him thoughtfully, as if not to miss any shade of meaning in what he said, “Do you think, then, there is a limit?”

Come, my friends,
'Tis not too late to seek a newer world.
Push off, and sitting well in order smite
The sounding furrows;
for my purpose holds
To sail beyond the sunset, and the baths
Of all the western stars, until I die.
It may be we shall touch the happy Isles,
And see the great Achilles, whom we knew.
Tho 'much is taken, much abides; & tho'
We are not now that strength which in old
days moved earth & heaven; that which we
are, we are;
One equal temper of heroic hearts,
Made weak by time & fate, but strong in will
To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield.

- Alfred Lord Tennyson -
An English poet often regarded as the chief representative of the Victorian age in poetry, 1809-1892
from The Brown Book

Things my mother taught me

Natural skin exfoliation is part of any good skin care regime. Regular use of an Exfoliant helps to keep your skin looking and feeling younger, smoother and healthier. Here is an exfoliant that you can whip up in seconds using ingredients from your kitchen cupboard.

my mother's recipe:
2 tablespoons of baking soda
2 tablesppons of oatmeal

& honey to form a paste - add a little water & you have your first application. If you don't fancy getting sticky you can always use
sorboline cream/lotion to form the paste (I use Cetaphil cleanser)

massage gently over face & neck & it's great for your hands as well!

I always make just enough for one application because it is so easy to do & that way it is always fresh too!

ENJOY!

Great women from art, literature & myth

Who is this, who has startled the deer?
Who has filled the woods with fear.... with fear
A young man, a hunter on the chase
Oh how beautiful, how lovely is his face….his face

I will follow him till I know what I must say
For with me words just get in the way….the way
He sees me now & harks “let us two meet”
And folish me all I can do is repeat.....repeat

Does he not share my new found love?
He flees and cries “enough”….enough
Ashamed I fall down in the grass
Until my time has passed….has passed

I see him now down by the spring
Gazing into its depths & wondering….wondering
At just how beautiful, how perfect he is
Until the earth below is his….is his

You can hear me call from cave, from hall
To you I am Echo, that is all…..is all
& by the spring daffodils grow tall
In remembrance of Narcissus, my love…my all

This world is full
of opportunities
which so few ever
do find;
They search the earth
near and far
but thet never
search their minds

- Laudividni -
from The Brown Book

Things my mother taught me

To match my lipstick with my outfit -

I remember being about five when my Mother first put lipstick on me for a special party - a very soft pink, close to my natural lip colour. I remember feeling the creamy texture and my Mother saying, "Now rub your lips together to make the colour sit just right".

When I was 15 my Mother took me to the cosmetics floor of a major department store and introduced me to the many collections of beautiful lipsticks - I was allowed to pick one to take home. My selection was Rasberry Glace by Clinique. My Mother continued to indulge me in all things cosmetic and taught me how to mix the lipstick palette to get just the right shade to match my outfits!

The way to do this:

1. Paint your lips with one coat of lipstick, the closest in colour to your frock as you can find!

2. Choose the next colour from your collection that will add just the right shade of colour to tint the first coat of lipstick to match your outfit perfectly - add a second coat using this shade. Sometimes a third colour is needed to achieve the desired shade - simply add a third coat!

3. To look extra dashing, finish with a top coat of clear gloss.

4. Remember to rub your lips together to mix the colour and smooth your lipstick across your lips to make it sit just right!

These days I can pop on my lipstick without looking, own far too many shades and consider this my favourite cosmetic of all time.

Great women from art, literature & myth

The birth of Venus, the grand Renaissance painting by Sandro Botticelli, was quite controversial in its day, going against the trend of Roman Catholic influence by showcasing a secular & mythological theme. Venus (Greek-Aphrodite), the goddess of love, beauty, laughter & marriage – arises from out of the sea. Roman & Greek Legend has it that when the god Uranus was castrated & his genitals thrown into the sea, the foam gave rise to Venus. At that very moment the rose flower also came into being – the rose, a universal symbol of love with its thorns reminding us that love can be both cruel & dangerous. Venus is greeted on her right by the west wind Zephyr, the gentle breeze of spring - he ushers her to shore. With him is his bride Flora the goddess that holds “perpetual sway over flowers” – she showers Venus with pink roses. To her left stands the hour spirit Horae – the nymph of spring, waiting to clothe a naked Venus & guide her to dry land.

Things my mother taught me

To do a little exercise each day - whether you feel like it or not. I remember going for long walks with my mother when I was as young as six. On the odd ocassion my eldest brother Peter would run up ahead, unbeknownst to mum & I, climb up a tree & jump down on us - he loved terrifying the life out of people....& still does

An early-morning walk is a blessing for the whole day.

-Thoreau-

Fragile Things

How fragile is a flower!
It may not last an hour!
Even more fragile are imaginings.

Yet thoughts and flowers both
possess the gift of growth.
I wonder at the strength of fragile things:

On a harsh peak, where rock
is shattered by the shock
of wind & frost, a fragile flower survives.

Oh, and one Christ-centred thought,
too tenuous to be caught
alters the whole direction of our lives.

James Dillet Freeman
from The Brown Book

Great women from art, literature & myth

Circe, great apothecary of Aeaea
What strange alchemy have you cast?
Your enemies, they prowl about your throne,
Awaiting the day you restore them back to life.

Circe, great sorceress of the sea
Who can resist your many charms?
Ten years of battle has seen the fall of Troy,
How long must it be till I reach my home?

Circe, this past year you have held me captive
As your lover, as your slave.
Be true to your word – your promise
And guide me home to Ithaca once again....

Great women from art, literature & myth

Anna Karenina, Tolstoy’s tale of Russian aristocracy, a story of forbidden love - of a love that cost one woman everything. When a married Anna first meets Vronsky there is an instant attraction, an immediacy & danger forged when they both witness a fatal accident at a train station. The two soon become secret lovers, until a public show of affection forces them to confess to a passion much too strong to hide. A proud husband and a society that prides itself upon certain principles (at the sacrifice of both truth & honesty); make it impossible for Anna to find peace. She is shunned by society, her husband refusing to let her go, despite being indifferent towards her; her lover resenting her for what she has cost him. In an act of final desperation, Anna is driven to do the unthinkable:

A feeling seized her like that she had experienced when preparing to enter the water in bathing, and she crossed herself. The familiar gesture of making the sign of the cross called up a whole series of girlish and childish memories, and suddenly the darkness, that obscured everything for her, broke, and life showed itself to her for an instant with all it’s bright past joys. But she did not take her eyes off the wheels of the approaching second carriage, and at the very moment when the midway point between the wheels drew level, she threw away her red bag, and drawing her head down between her shoulders threw herself forward on her hands under the carriage, and with a light movement as if preparing to rise again, immediately dropped on her knees. And at that same moment she was horror-struck at what she was doing. “Where am I? What am I doing? Why?” She wished to rise, to throw herself back, but something huge and relentless struck her on the head and dragged her down. “God forgive me everything!” she said, feeling the impossibility of struggling…..A little peasant muttering something was working at the rails. The candle, by the light of which she had been reading that book full of anxieties, deceptions, grief, and evil, flared up with a brighter light than before, lit up for her all that had before been dark, flickered, began to grow dim, and went out for ever.

I have seen something else under the sun: The race is not to the swift or the battle to the strong, nor does food come to the wise or wealth to the brilliant or favour to the learned; but time and chance happen to them all.

from The Brown Book
Ecc. 9 v 11

Great women from art, literature & myth

Venus of Willendorf, crafted from limestone some 25,000 years ago – a relic from the Palaeolithic ages. A woman so large & yet so small - standing at all of 4 ½ inches tall, she was discovered on the banks of the Danube. But this Venus could not stand at all as her tiny feet fail to support her frame, suggesting that perhaps she was meant to always be held. Is her face downcast or is she faceless? Her thin arms they drape over bulging breasts; her vulva pulses out - protruding from between her accentuated thighs. Venus of Willendorf, you great symbol of fertility!….who was it that carved you out from stone? Who was the first to hold you within the palm of their hand?

Things my mother taught me

How to make pikelets

Ingredients:

3 eggs

2 tablespoons of castor sugar
a pinch of salt
3 cups of full cream milk

& self raising flour to thicken (aprox 3-4 cups)

steps:

1. You must have the pan hot, but before you heat it up cover base with a thin layer of butter

2. whisk the eggs & castor sugar till it becomes frothy

3. add the pinch of salt & milk

4. Add sifted flour a little at a time till it's smooth & thick (think the consistency of custard)

You are now ready to start making pikelets!

Now make sure the pan is hot over medium heat, pour into the pan the size pikelet you desire & wait till it lightly bubbles all over (approx 1 minute) - then it is time to flip them over to the other side.

If for some reason the first batch don't turn out quite perfect, not to worry as it happens every time but the rest will be divine!

makes 10 large or 20 medium sized pikelets

Eat them hot or wait till they cool.

When hot they are delicious with maple syrup & a scoop of ice cream or my favourite: a dusting of icing sugar & fresh lemon juice!

When cool they are great served with your favourite jam & fresh cream. Batter should be used within 24hrs & kept refrigerated

ENJOY!

Anais Anais

My favourite scent is Anais Anais by Cacharel, it has been a mainstay for the past decade whilst I dabble in other fragrances. A delicate perfume best worn when the sun is shining & you're dressed in florals or pastels.

Anais (ah-nah-iss), a name of Hebrew origin meaning "grace" & "favour". Anais Anais - it conjures up the eroticism that was Anais Nin......so seemingly fragile yet so potent with her writings of raw sexuality. Anais Anais - a spray to each pulse point of the wrist & one to the side of the neck.....left or right, depending on which one you offer up unto another.

In order to seek
one's own direction,
one must SIMPLIFY the
mechanics of ordinary,
everyday life.

From the Brown Book
- Plato -

Perfume

Perfume - Such a sweet thing it is to own a bottle of perfume. It is my signature scent I say, oh yes it is all mine (well so I think anyway)! I have my perfumes placed beautifully on one round ceramic dish painted prettily with roses.

There sits:
1 bottle of Rose Absolue by Annick Goutal
1 bottle of Red Roses by Jo Malone &
1 bottle of Rose by L'Erbolario

A lady floated by the other day and I thought, my goodness my Mother must be near - the smell of Yves Saint Laurent's Opium is upon us! "What is that perfume you are wearing?", the lady replied, "Opium". I nodded and said, "Ahh my Mother's perfume".

Perfume is such a lovely invention, truly one of the most beautiful luxuries made for women. Able to evoke feeling as it awakens memories long forgotten - before such knowledge of the brain and the connections to smell, this must have appeared quite magical in days gone by!

I met a lady today that purchased a bottle of Diorissimo perfume to feel close to the memories of her Mother. As we spoke, she sprayed her wrist with the perfume and there it was, this beautiful joy that swept across her face! I felt the warmth of her connection and I was in awe of the power of scent, of perfume!

What is your favourite perfume - is it completely different to your Mother's?

"We all know persons who are affected for better or for worse by certain odors...Over and over again I have experienced the quieting influence of Rose scent upon a disturbed state of mind, feeling the troubled condition smoothing out before I realised that Roses were in the room, or near at hand"
- Louise Beebe Wilder -

Things my mother taught me

To never enter a person's private room unless you are invited & accompanied by the person to whom that space belongs.

Inspirational women - Audrey Hepburn 1929-1993

It is our intention to do a feature blog each week on a woman who has inspired us. The first of these ladies would have to be the timeless Audrey Hepburn.

I clearly remember the first time I ever saw Audrey Hepburn, it was in Roman Holiday, I must have been about 8 years old, and it took me all of about 5 minutes to fall in love with her. I loved her face, her great doe-like eyes; the way she held herself, so poised & elegant; I even loved the way she spoke with no trace of her heritage….a true child of the world. Audrey Hepburn was beautiful until the day she died, a true beauty inside & out and was known in her later years for her tireless work as a Goodwill ambassador for UNICEF.

We love you Audrey.

Favourite Audrey moments:

5. Singing “Moon River” (Breakfast at Tiffany’s)
4. Hiding from Linus Larabee in the Garage (Sabrina)
3. The “mouth of truth” scene with Gregory Peck (Roman Holiday)
2. Selling flowers in the street (My Fair Lady)
1. Looking for Cat in the rain (Breakfast at Tiffany’s)

Live Deliberately, Live Deep

I went into the woods

Because I wanted to live deliberately

I wanted to live deep

And suck out all the marrow of life

To put to rout all that was not life

And not when I had come to die

Discover that I had not lived

- Thoreau -
from the Brown Book

If thou must love me

If thou must love me, let it be for naught

Except for love's sake only. Do not say

'I love her for her smile...her look...her way

Of speaking gently...for a trick of thought

That falls in well with mine, and certes brought

A sense of pleasant ease on such a day' -

For these things in themselves, Beloved, may

Be changed, or change for thee, - and love so wrought,

May be unwrought so. Neither love me for

Thine own dear pity's wiping my cheeks dry,

Since one might well forget to weep who bore

Thy comfort long, and lose thy love thereby,

But love me for love's sake, that evermore

Thou may'st love on through love's eternity.

- Elizabeth Barrett Browning 1806-1881